Breaking down the Heroes Game trophy contenders
While Nebraska's focus is on starting a new rivalry with Wisconsin this week, that doesn't mean we can't take a moment to consider Nebraska's already named but still trophy-less rivalry with Iowa. For now, we will disregard Nebraska's "designated rival." It's all so complicated these days.
Anyway, the student groups at Iowa and Nebraska have obviously learned from the Cy-Hawk trophy debacle and are exempting themselves from trophy backlash by putting the ultimate design in the hands of the general public.
I think this is a good thing but then again the general public seems to really like "The Big Bang Theory." Too late to go back now. The website is already up and taking votes. All that's left now is to wait and hope that America - or at least Iowa and Nebraska - makes the right choice.
And make no mistake, threre's a clear winner in the four candidates:
1) The Corn Bowl - This one is mostly fine. A presumably cool, art deco, gold bowl that will be filled with REAL CORN. Sort of like the Orange Bowl. I'll sign on to this one if and only if the winning team gets to actually fill the bowl with team colored corn from a giant Pioneer sack that ABC simply won't be able to resist showing sitting on the sidelines throughout the game. Think of the anticipation! (And Pioneer, think about the brand exposure.) Grade: B
2) Corn Cob - Choose this one if you don't have problem with everyone outside of Iowa and Nebraska making fun of the two states for having a very phallic rivalry trophy. Corn cobs make great Thanksgiving centerpieces but, on their own, they aren't all that interesting. Grade: C-
3) Corn Stalk - Good if you like chainsaw art. They say this will be hand carved and I'm sure it would be an amazing bit of craftsmanship but all I really see is this. Grade: F
4) Pitchfork - Unlike corn cobs, pitchforks are inherently cool. (Except, of course, Arizona State's new rocketfork. That's awful.) The best rivalry trophies have always been tools - an axe, a skillet, a jug, a barrel, a barrel of nails, a bucket, a spade - because they're portable and can be held aloft over the victors' head's in glory. The pitchfork checks all those boxes while still giving a nod to the agricultural link between the two states. It's also sort of menacing - again an axe, a cannon, a tomahawk, the bones, a shillelagh - another hallmark of all great rivalry trophies. A clear winner. Grade: A+
Get out the vote.
Click here for an important update to this post.